Do you hate it when you get up in the morning? You did not sleep that great!? And there is this piercing/jabbing pain by your right shoulder? When you raise your shoulder blade to test it out ouch! Oh I need to do some movement exercises I need to get a wheat bag on that. I need to take a Panadol for that. And you don’t because you forgot because you get up and do the regular motions and all the time there is this niggling pain in your shoulder.  You have to go through the action sequences of morning routine w/time management skills too! I’m thinking maybe my shoulder is linked to Tennis elbow, hell! I don’t even play tennis! But you know I had the same thing before when I was only carrying my baby so ……yeah! Chew on that!

Wow! I have been down in the dumps about  how hard it is  being a mother of two kids with Autism.

I have felt like a robot.

I was just going through the motions of daily life because I had to keep things going. While I wanted to fall apart and just stop! Trying to keep my ship afloat with all my family in it.

Trying to keep the bills paid and buy the food as well as get the petrol for the car.

Trying to encourage my children to actually be social and play with other children. It has taken some time.

Or even quite possibly be on time to school, which much to the kids credit they do try hard to do what I say and we are at school, on time, allot of the time.

There just does not seem to be enough time. Does this cycle ever stop!

And it is nobodys fault there is no-one to blame or thank for my hardship! I decided to have two children and was lucky enough to be able to.

It’s just bloody well hard.

Rushing out to the shops to buy groceries or  trying to fit in picking up wood from the woodshop for the fire inbetween drop off or picking the kids up from school and something else! Always having  one million things that could be done. Being tired, needing a rest but not being able or feeling able to. I prefer to do the shopping by myself as when I take the kids they always want something. I don’t have enough money to buy anything in the shop for them.

Not being able to get a goood nights sleep because the boys Nanna or Grandpa are having health issues and hospitalizations or clinic appointments. Or Hubby has gone to hospital for something. The support base is crumbling away from me at times. What to do? Well I recognize that we all need to take care of ourselves so I got respite care services in to help.